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Starshine
 in response to CATLUV...   smile
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CATLUV
 in response to Starshine...   Thanks, me too. The issue was getting a diagnosis ... it took over 4 years, a lot of pain and suffering, testing, struggling with doctors and the medical system. I have what they call "sero-negative" auto immune diseases, and so my blood work doesn't fit in the diagnostic criteria boxes which they like to rely on so much. But, my MRI's and other films show a very different story, and it's disturbing that the other docs I have seen didn't take the time to look at them after they didn't see anything on my blood panels but had so much with symptoms/clinical presentation .. there's a lot of damage, but I am so thankful and grateful that there are some treatment options to assist in freezing the disease progression where it's at. It will be a life long thing, treatments to look forward to, and while one of the disorders can go into remission the other one doesn't. Anyways, that's that and I am excited to get pieces of myself and my life back!
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Starshine
 in response to CATLUV...   hi cat
happy to here of new treatment for you
good healh you
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CATLUV
 in response to Anonymous40784...   Hi there,

Well I certainly understand .. it still makes my heart heavy to think of the hurt and hear your pain. It makes me sad to know you've lost that something in the ability to continue helping others, but it's very understandable .. and perhaps it will shift in the future sometime, as your heart needs to heal and that takes time. I know for myself that I go in spurts when it comes to writing, posting and sharing with/helping people here; sometimes my heart is not in it and it's too much to deal with, as so many problems become overwhelming and there are many out there whom are either scamming and/or mentally unstable/unhealthy, and they take and take and take, and it's hard to limit the energy output and not exhaust yourself emotionally, physically and spiritually when helping on the other side.
I am doing all right. It's been a very exhausting month in many respects, and I think I am trying to recover without slipping into a flare episode. I start new treatments at the beginning of the new month, following the final tests with my heart. My blood work came back in good standing to proceed, but there remains some concern with my heart and the worry that one of the auto immune diseases may have begun to attack my heart. Keep your fingers crossed that my body can take the treatments and that it will help freeze these disease progressions. I am nervous, scared, anxious and excited. I am just so grateful to have answers now and a direction for treatment to improve my quality of life and slow the damage throughout my body.
How are you feeling aside from the entire mess of emotions which have come from the Hurricane known as Susan? I hope it hasn't affected your physical body negatively as well ... but stress, strong emotion, pain, all of it, seem to creep into our bodies and manifest in a physical manner eventually .. with or without our knowledge, desire, consent, etc. unfortunately.
Sending you big hugs, Cat
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Anonymous40784
 in response to CATLUV...   hi there sweet girl,

You are probably right.
Yet, we have to pay a price for all of our actions.

I hope you are feeling better.

I was very hurt over the Susan/Chris deal. So much in fact, that I have 'lost' my desire to help others. And,thats not like me. Just tired of getting hurt in the process.

Hope you have a great night.
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CATLUV
 in response to mypassion2...   Can I say that Syphilis has been around for a very long time ... one of the "oldest" sexually transmitted diseases ... not fun and it will kill you eventually, and not in a pretty way. I can't speak to the 70's boy's, I was not here .. at least in this body! But, I don't think that the drive, desire, and mentality has changed much for the entire time we've been on this earth when it comes to "primal desires & behaviors" ... just "hidden" better at various periods in time throughout history. But, that's just my personal opinion. Might I add too, females are not nearly as innocent as some make them out to be ... many desire sex, and sex without strings/relationships, etc., and it's not always about "love" and "respect" for females either. Just saying.
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CATLUV
 in response to NikkiK...   Hi, I am sorry, this is out of left field, but what you shared surprised me and I am interested ... you pay for child support for your step child whom is no longer a minor? Did you adopt this child at some point? Obviously this is none of my business and you don't have to share or respond, but I was quite shocked and intrigued by this. Best to you, Cat
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CATLUV
 in response to mamashe/sheshe...   Well it's not just your daughter my dear!!! LOL. I think most females operate this way ... or at least the one's I have known. I thought the same, and did the same when I was a teenager, and even in my early twenties ... and it's not like I'm not "educated" or lacking wisdom or "street smarts" .. so to speak ... but I still, somewhere in the back of my little mind, thought of these "excuses" to live in that moment, .. and might I add, that typically the age group we're speaking of is the more likely bracket to be drinking, partying, what have you, much of the time when they have intercourse, especially when it's with a person they are not in a relationship with - whether it be a one night stand or a friends with benefits type of deal. And, well, we all know what that does to a person's reasoning abilities, behaviors, among other things.
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CATLUV
 in response to Anonymous40784...   Can I say that i think it has a lot to do with a person (a female, usually a young female) feeling as though they are not "loved" in this life, don't have good or healthy family support, and believe that by having children they will create a family, or someone to love them unconditionally, just as they've never experienced, wanted, needed, etc., ... just a piece of it, but i think it's a pretty big piece.
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NikkiK
 in response to bleu232...   Or take offense wither way it is no bother to me. I understand how a woman conceives...I am not a child.... Why would you have so many children if you can not afford them is my question?! WHY MAKE YOUR CHILDREN SUFFER!? IS THAT LOVE? IS THAT RESPONSIBLE? No I am not a man, no I don't sit in a bar, and yes I PAY child support for my step daughter, which is completely unfair that I get to raise a grown woman and her children (only one belongs to my husband) this society is ridiculous. WAIT you must be a woman who lives off of the ex's pay check because you are to lazy to get up and get your own!? SELFISH SHAME ON YOU!
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Starshine
 in response to mamashe/sheshe...   There is a bladder control health food store.
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mamashe/sheshe
 in response to CATLUV...   Hi Catluv, after reading your post to me I am convinced that you must have known my daughters, you hit the whole discussion right on the nose. Thanks sincerely mamashe
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mamashe/sheshe
 in response to Schmidty...   I think your right ....that it is 45 for males or 40...one or the other and females mature way earlier than the guys, there was a whole program on this very subject on Dr Phil a year or so ago and they had dr's and other professionals backing up this whole maturity thing and men have always (as far as I'm concerned) thought with their penis and once a lady gets that through her head she can then control the relationship . thanks for sharing my friend. sheila mamashe/sheshe
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Schmidty
 in response to mypassion2...   Downlook on life, my friend, I'm from a small town out in the wheat fields of Kansas, Bible thumpers heaven. I have been around the block a few times, heck around the town. It was a military town. I know what goes on, or I should say went on, 18-25 year olds come into town ready to drink and party. I did not have my head up a tiny little hole where the sun doesn't shine and so tight that it cut the circulation off to my head.
I was taught, like most, to respect women. I respect them a lot more now than I did then. I've learned to be honest with and about myself. No fantasy world. Sounds as if that town was stuck in the middle ages which if what you say is really true then I wish I would have been there myself.
I'm not going to mention about families . That's not proof of anything, except that it goes along with this conversation.
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Schmidty
 in response to mamashe/sheshe...   I see you are up and at'm, good to see you in here. Hope your day is a great on.Later
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mypassion2
 in response to Schmidty...   WOW, what a downlook on life. I guess I lived in a different part of the country. I live in Massachusetts, in a small town called Colrain. We respected each other, sure there was sex, pot and drugs, but not to an overload. If you met a girl and she liked you it would take 2 to 3 weeks before having sex (or as they use to say Balling). I respected women always have, you must met some really winners. You bet what you receive, treat people witth kindness and you will receive the same. You can think it's bull, but it's true. I have 3 daughters, one son and 12 grandchildren to prove it.
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Anonymous
im in deep trouble! please help
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Schmidty

 in response to mypassion2...   In the 70's? Come on man I'm only a couple of years older and That isn't right ,it was still time for Free Love, Peace and all that garbage. I don't care what century it is in men don't think with the head on top their shoulders. (most of them) If he can get it , he doesn't care how, when or where. I remember crabs, clap, syphilis, gonorrhea and it was about that time that Aids came about.

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mypassion2
S small story of my life: Born 1959, went to school, college, military, got a great job making 6 figures. The in July 2006 I was driving home from work, beautiful, sunny day when out of nowhere a drunk drive hit me head on. My head went through the windshield, my spine was crushed, and now I am in a wheelchair with a serive dog "Baby" 155 pound Saint Bernard. I am on SSDI making a whooping 1300 a month, I was making that in a week. So things change but you learn to adjust, never give up
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CATLUV
 in response to mamashe/sheshe...   I certainly agree with the fact young females don't have a switch that goes off in their heads until 25 or so. You can be told over and over, have the information, repeat the facts and statistics, but then when it comes down to it, the thought that goes thru their heads is .. 'well, you can only really get preggers 3 days out of the month, if that, ... we will do this or that and it will lower chances of pregnancy ... and then there's, oh well, it's already done, I'll be in denial until I become really freaked out cause my period doesn't arrive.'
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